What aspects of your shadow are you projecting?
- Are you sometimes judgemental about the appearance of others?
Does this reflect insecurities that you have?
-Do you find yourself annoyed by loud "attention seeking people?
Are you socially awkward, shy or scared of making a fool of yourself?
- Are you annoyed or amused by people who ask "stupid" questions?
Maybe you're scared of being viewed as stupid yourself?
When I was younger, I would get annoyed by this particular girl in my class who would constantly ask questions. I rolled my eyes, grew irritated and made fun when she asked "stupid" questions.
Looking back, I realised that I myself was terrified of looking stupid. I avoided asking teachers for help and would grow incredibly embarrassed whenever I struggled with a subject.
The 3-2-1 Process
This process is a way of integrating your Shadow. It focuses on an aspect that you project onto others and works down from 3rd person to 1st person.
First, pick a person with a negative quality that particularly annoys you (a work colleague, your partner, a family member or just an acquaintance).
Describe these qualities (in 3rd person) you can talk out loud, write them down or even use art to express yourself. Don't hold back or try to sugar coat anything, honesty is key!
Next "talk" to the person (in 2nd person) tell them about your issues, ask them questions about their behaviour and imagine their responses.
Finally, become that person. Use 1st person language and imagine why they are acting that way. Be non-judgemental and understanding. Say or write "I" statements to describe their feelings.
Is this a Shadow quality in you? Something that you have rejected and surpressed. Think about why you might of rejected this quality, what early experiences may have led you to do so.
Once you have an understanding of this quality in others, you can begin to show understanding of this quality in yourself, integrating your Shadow aspect into yourself to create a more rounded personality.
Imagine that the personality is a scale, with desirable traits placed on the right (the Persona) and undesirable traits on the left (the Shadow).
The aim is to remain balanced, if we put too much weight on one side of the scales, they will suddenly flip. When we restrain our darker aspects for too long, they can suddenly lash out. A quiet, calm individual may suddenly have an emotional outburst, Someone who always pushes themselves to work hard may find all their motivation abandons them, a shy and reserved person may suddenly get drunk and go absolutely wild.
Polarity is deeply ingrained in nature, but it is something many people struggle to accept in themselves.
Think of the wheel of the year, the balance of light and dark all year round. The long warm days of summer, contrasted by the long cold nights of winter. Springtime, when life and growth are blooming is counteracted by autumn's spreading death.
All if these things are a beautiful and necessary part of nature. We understand that we can't have one without the other.
The same is true inside ourselves. We cannot create light without darkness. Every positive aspect we add to our Persona, creates a counterpart for our Shadow.
To master the Shadow is to learn how to balance these two sides. Because if we don't, the Shadow will find a way to do this on its own.
Ceremonially releasing the Shadow
The book "Owning your Shadow" by Robert Johnson (a big influence on this post) has a brilliant example of this where a couple honor their Shadow through a pre-wedding ceremony using ritual Shadow vows.
"I will give you an identity and make the world see you as an extension of me"
"I will be compliant and sweet, but I underneath I will have the real control. If anything goes wrong I will take your money and your house"
I think these vows are a fantastic and imaginative way to pre-emptively balance out the wedding day, giving the Shadow its due.
How could you release your Shadow?
For this you will need to have a basic idea of your Shadow, and what aspects of yourself you may repress.
You could write a story, poem or get down your inner thoughts. Maybe create a character with your repressed traits and let them loose.
If you are artistic then you could draw/paint something that releases your Shadow. This isn't for anyone else to see, make it as graphic, disgusting or raw as you feel.
If you're a musician you could perform or create a piece that expresses your Shadow. Let yourself be swept up in the music.
The key here is not to question or judge what you are creating. This will be difficult because you have repressed your Shadow for a reason, I'm asking you to wholeheartedly accept parts of yourself you have rejected. Let yourself feel the emotions completely and do not hold back. It should be an intense experience where you give yourself over to your Shadow in a safe way, lest it come out at an unexpected time and cause havoc.
Once this is over I advise you do something calming to recover. Things like meditation , taking a ritual bath or a self love spell would be good here.
Source : aminoapp.com
( Sophieg113 )